Casa de mi padre/The Cabin the Woods

Watching Casa de mi Padre you get the sense that Will Ferrell was sitting around and just thought 'wouldn't it be funny to make a telenovela-style film entirely in spanish' and then just went and did it with some buddies. That's essentially all this is, and I appreciate it. The premise and execution is sufficiently silly that the film is a fun watch, but it does ultimately prove too thin to support a full feature. As a half an hour episode of a sketch show it would have been great, but at 80 minutes you definitely can feel it stretching. I can easily see this turning into one of those films that you don't seek out, but when its (heaviliy-edited version) is showing on Comedy central to stop flipping channels for 20 minutes to watch.

The Cabin in The Woods

This movie is awesome. I hate to be one of those guys who says you shouldn't know anything about a film before seeing it, because that's usually not necessary, but here I think that's really true. The great pleasure of the film is seeing how inventively the story unfolds, as well as how it plays with all the tropes of the genre it's playing with (in this case horror). That last sentence makes its seem like a parody, which it most assuredly isn't (at least not in The Naked Gun sense). This is more of a subversion, and you don't need to be intimitately familiar with horror films to enjoy it. But whatever, just go see it. Much like Joss Whedon's work with Buffy and Angel, it has the right mix of irony and sincerity to keep you engaged and laughing the whole time. Seriously, from the opening sequence to the absolutely insane ending I was grinning like a fool. I'm not claiming that this is the greatest film of all time, or that its perfect, but its a lot of fun and I enjoyed the hell out of it

One Tree hill: series FInale

Well since this show that's brought me so much joy over the years is having its series finale (allegedly). This has to be a live blog.

As a primer read this article. I'm glad somebody else appreciates how great this is.

-Crap this is a two hour series finale. Not sure I can make this (yes I can).

-Oh the first half is a retrospective of 'the landmark drama that spanned 9 seasons over two television networks' - I don't think I can even take this much pretension. I'll be back.

-I've got the retrospective on in the background as I work, and the people who work on the show treat it with a reverence usually reserved for The Wire. I think this makes my dream of the whole thing ending with an alien invasion unlikely.

-'I remember hearing about columbine and people speaking softly about it. I thought what a tragedy, somebody should say something loudly about it.' - So lets do an episode about a bullied kid who brings a gun to school, kills himself, and then have one of the characters be shot by their brother. Incisive social commentary that is.

-The helpful onscreen countdown clock tells me we have seven minutes until the final episode. Better get on my tree hill ravens sweatshirt.

- I can't get over the fact that Morgan Earp from Deadwood is Brooke's husband on this show. Its not like he was that memorable on that show, but still...

-'It got really uncomfortable being the only black person on this show. Seriously the original draft of the final episode had me getting lynched.' - Actor who plays Skillz

-:33 seconds, so excited

-We open on the river court. Nathan jams on an eight foot rim. And he gets out of an SUV and stares at himself. Flash-back fakeout.

-They do the same thing with Brooke, who's actually watching Julian shoot a TV show of her life in high school. How meta.

-And Now Haley gets to creepily stare at her high school self through a window. Where's Chris hanson when you need him.

-Mouth is doing situps with Millie - guess he wants to get down to 26% body fat.

-Well our first band placement, Blind Pilot. I actually saw these guys on letterman and I kind of liked them so I'll give them a pass on this one.

-My boy Dan left $500k to mouth. Hopefully this leads to a massive overdose.

-So it looks like this episode is really just going to spend a lot of time with the characters wistfully thinking about the past (facilitated by Julian rebuilding their high school hang-outs for his show). How disappointing. On the other hand two episodes ago ended with Dan rescuing Nathan (an NBA shooting guard) from a European Basketball cabal (seriously) since the authorities weren't doing enough to find him. I guess I shouldn't complain.

-Every character who ever sang over the last nine years is apparently going to get three minutes to sing. I guess that's one way to fill 70 minutes.

-Let me take a minute here to discuss The Lucky One. Which is unsurprisingly being promoted heavily in this episode. How is this scenario romantic? A guy finds a random picture of a chick (presumably on the dead body of her husband/boyfriend) tracks her down. Rather than calling the authorities she's like 'well lets see where this goes.' I need to rethink my whole dating approach.

-Clay and Quinn have an hour to kill before he can sign the custody papers for his son (the one he 'forgot' he had for four years). I'm sure nothing bad will happen in the meantime.

-Its looking like nothing crazy is going to happen. I'll be honest I'm losing interest.

-The promo for the Vampire Diaries just called its viewers "VD Fans..." awesome.

-Gavin Degraw now gets a song, I can't say that there is ever a better mix of artist and show then Gavin and One Tree Hill. And he's wearing a fedora. Of course he is.

-There is a lot of random slow-mo in this episode. The most random being Mouth finishing a sit-up (or maybe that was in real time),

-Julian is wearing a hat with the state of north carolina on it. All Class.

-Mouth uses the money to endow a scholarship for kids pursuing sports-related degrees. Because that's who needs the support.

-Gavin (and his fedora) get a second song.

-I really should have just posted quotes from the retrospective episode.

-In perfect keeping with the reactionary nature of this episode Julian buys brooke her old house, which the one thing she wanted more than anything else. Whatever.

-The abandoned four year old is already calling Quinn (who he met two weeks ago) mom. Yeah this won't end in over-dependency and a homicide in ten years.

-It sort of cracks me up that the comments on the article I linked at up top are overwhelmingly complaining that the author forgot to mention smallville when talking about the WB.

-Gavin gets a third song. Of course its a hard rock remix of the show theme. Edgy.

- I do love how two of the main characters from the first six years (Peyton and Lucas) aren't even acknowledged in the final episode. Its not like the actors are too busy.

-Continuing montage just showing everyone being happy. Now sing along to the chorus of the song. Really weak way to go out.

-Still only one black actor sighting so there's that I guess.

-Wow they cleared a U2 song (Tree Hill) I guess they had too.

-And we have a flsh-forward where everybody is meeting up at a high school basketball game. Which is surprisingly (not really) well attended. Sure, why not.

-Now a bunch of super pretentious voiceovers with earnest life lessons.

"the world is full of magic, you just have to believe in it" "so make your wish, do you have it? Good. Now believe in it, with all your heart." Freeze frame - credits.

Well that's it, the glorious run is over with a whimper. Still I can't deny I got a disproportionate amount of enjoyment out a show I really started watching because where I was living nine years ago only got three channels. RIP One Tree Hill. I look forward to seeing most of the cast starring in Lifetime movies in the next six months.

Post Script: The onion AV club has a write up of the episode and has some links to some choice moments at the end.

21 Jump Street/ The Hunger Games/The raid: redemption

21 Jump Street

For those who want a plot description (not that it matters). Anyway, I liked it. Its not anything more than its tries to be (which is an irreverent take-off of an eighties TV show that I've never seen), and is generally funny. Plus its the first time I've really enjoyed Channing Tatum in a featured role (Step Up excepted of course) so there's that. I wouldn't necessarily go out of my to see it again, but if it's showing on a plane (which is doubtful in its current form), I'd watch it.

The Hunger Games

Plot Points

This is a difficult film for me to review with any objectivity since I've already read, and enjoyed, the books its based on. I can say that I thought the acting was decent, the special effects a little cheap looking, and that it was generally entertaining. However I think if I hadn't read the books I'd have found it a little long, and a lot of the 'significant' moments would have felt perfunctory and rushed. In particular, I think I would have missed much of the subtext (to be fair I was strung out on heroin while watching) and just shrugged at some of the more emotional moments. However even in its more watered form its 10,000 times more interesting than twilight.

The Raid: Redemption

I really wanted to like The Raid. Advance word was all super positive, and made it sound like a balls-to-the-wall, super intense, actioner. Well there is a lot of action but the whole thing ultimately fell flat. It has two big problems. First, other than a few perfunctory nods, it gives you very little reason to care about any of the characters. Its just 'fight-break-fight' for 100 minutes. This isn't in itself a fatal flaw, bit the film needs to give you some way to feel the stakes and that all the carnage matters, rather than just giving the impression that you're watching a video game. This leads me to my second problem, with is with the fights themselves. They're cool in a sort of bunch of guys sitting around a tv saying 'Damn' way, and as a twenty minute demo reel of fight choreography they'd be really effective. However in a film that's trying to portray a super intense fight to the death they come of as cartoony, and eventually, tedious. They go on forever, and the film is so self-serious it eventually becomes a slog. I was obviously in the minority as there was a lot cheering at the end of my screening so I guess I'm just a precious little flower who can't handle bad-assery.

John Carter

Here's the relevant plot points. I'm sort of fascinated by flops, and once it looked like John Carter was on that path (or as much as a film that'll probably break $150 million gross can be) I decided to check it out before it ended its run. Plus I started to hear some pushback reviews suggesting it wasn't as bad as the early word. After watching it, I guess that's true.

Now it does have problems, to wit:

-It's overly long (well over two hours)

-The script is better than the phantom menace, but probably worse than Avatar (expository at best, and sooooo self -serious)

-Taylor Kitch is incredibly miscast, though since I've yet to see him in something where I actually liked him I'm not sure what properly cast would be (Maybe the forthcoming battleship). Lets just say if Mcnulty had played the lead instead of the main bad guy I'd have been much more into it.

All that said, the action scenes are well done (you can generally follow what's going on) and it has a few nice moments. Plus when it ended with an obvious set up for a sequel I had enough interest in the characters to think I would probably check out a followup as a matinee if nothing I liked better was showing. So there you go.

Friends with kids

To get the relevant plot description read this. And really, that review also sums up how I feel about the film. It has a strong cast, with some nice moments of observation, but its depiction of marriage and kids is in some ways as cliched as something you'd see in an Adam Sandler film. Don't get me wrong I'm not exactly Mr. 'Kid's are all roses and sunshine' but I have many friends who are starting to, or already have had, kids and none of their lives are as completely ruined or chaotic as the couples portrayed in this film. Its almost cartoony at times, which is too bad because it does have elements that do recommend it. If it had been able to keep away from the shrill character dynamics, and genre required plot machinations, I think there could have really been something interesting here about being single in your late 30's. What we're left with is a well-acted, occasionally insightful, but generally problematic comedy. Which is still more than I can say about The Vow (I just assume, I never saw it. As far as you know).

One Tree Hill Update/Chronicle

I know many of you have been devastated about the lack of One Tree Hill recaps, and all I can say is that I apologize. Its a complete fail on my part, and I have no excuse for it (except for the re-emergence of my raging coke habit). Anyway I watched the last half hour of the most recent episode and boy did it not disappoint. My favorite part revolved around Clay and his long-lost son. Now we all knew that Clay's wife died about four years ago, but what was never mentioned, until this very episode, was that they had a kid as well. Why was it never mentioned (or indeed why did this fact never come up in the many conversations he had with his dead wife's hallucination)? Well apparently Clay was so broken up by his wife's death that he just immediately blocked the fact that he had a son from his memory and skipped town. Awesome. Let that sink in for a minute. Basically the writers just decided:

'Hey we need to introduce some more drama, lets give Clay a kid. But we've never mentioned this progeny before how can we get around the fact that Clay's essentially been a dead beat dad for several years? I know - traumatic amnesia, and conveniently he never sent any sort of baby photos/announcements/pleas for cash to any friends or family in that whole time as well. And his current girlfriend will just think this is all completely normal. Done'

Anyway, when he finally realizes that his kid is still around (living in institutional care) he tells the kid that he's really sorry and would like to be part of his life going forward. Well the kid, displaying the most rationality of any character in this show, says no and walks out of the room. Burn. Of course I'm sure this will lead to a three episode arc of Clay trying to buy, I mean, earn his son's affection back using some convieniently placed items from the CW's sponsors. I love this show.

Chronicle

I saw this a few weeks ago, and generally enjoyed it. I'm sort of blase about the found footage gimmick, but not as annoyed as most people seem to be. Also the last seen has one of the worst green-screened backgrounds I've ever seen. Seriously its amazingly bad. I guess the budget constraints were seriously hard and binding. That's what she said.

Haywire

I immediately left the country after seeing this (note correlation does not imply causation) so my motivation to write a lot has fallen. As always here's the onion review if you want a plot recap.

I actually enjoyed haywire quite a bit, and liked the matter of fact manner in which it was executed. In particular the fight scenes (though not completely realistic) weren't needlessly drawn out and seemed appropriately brutal. Still at this point is does seem like Soderbergh's kind of just screwing with us. First he makes a film starring a porn star that features no sex (The girlfriend experience), then a seventies style disaster film just so he can market it around Gwenyth Paltrow dying (Contagion), and now he uses a MMA star with no acting experience to make a compelling spy thriller built entirely around her (and it works). When you next consider his next project is a fictionalized account of Channing Tatum's time spent as a male stripper, it just seems like he wants to show everyone he can do whatever he wants (and once I heard that this last project will star Matthew Mcconaughey as Tatum's mentor you know its going to great) and make it work. If it came out that he was going to make etch a sketch the movie, starring snooki, and it turned out to be entertaining I wouldn't be shocked.

So yeah, go see haywire.