One Tree Hill

I know I haven't been as consistent blogging about the show I should have been (but don't think this doesn't mean I haven't been watching), but since we're at the season finale I would feel remiss and like I was letting all none of you down if I didn't offer my usual ramblings. So here we go.

-The episode begins with Lucas carrying Peyton, in her bloody wedding dress, into the hospital (because calling an ambulance wouldn't have been preferable). And before you get any ideas he didn't hit her with a bat or anything, her mysterious illness suddenly kicked in right after the wedding which apparently manifests itself as plot convenient bleeding and pasing out
-We then cut to Nathan out hitting the bottle in desolation over not having been signed by the Clippers. Will now refrain from easy joke about blake griffin drinking after having been signed by the clippers
-We then fade to black and see Lucas picking a baby out a crib in the next scene. But where's Peyton? Damn you commercial
-Ahh she's in a coma. And lucas has apparently been spending his time pouring root beer floats in her hospital room (seriously they pan over like five full floats next to her bed, and he makes a lame joke about how he may have to drink them all himself if she doesn't wake up soon). Lucas is apparently going off the deep end and I couldn't be happier.
-Everyone is sad
-Mia can't enjoy her new record because Peyton is sick
-Brooke can't sleep because Peyton is sick
-We just learned Peyton's record label is called Bed Bedroom records. WTF?
-Lucas is so sad he's moved beyond five o clock shadow to seven o clock shadow
-Wow, peyton wakes up before the second chimerical break. I thought for sure they would drag this out for an entire episode. You are crafty writers. There is no way she doesn't have at least one more flat line scene before the end of this.
-Hey look Moira Kelly's back. I completely forgot that she was the original headliner of the show. Now she only gets occasional guest spots. Do you think she sits at home throwing beer bottles at the TV and screams, 'I was in The Cutting Edge Damnit!'
-Man, Peyton is home. I'm a little disappointed this coma thing disappeared so closely. Still half an hour left though, there's no way the show lets me down. Something is coming
-Aaah, Nathan gets signed by the Charlotte Bobcats. I guess Raymond Felton is out of a job. If this means Larry Brown becomes a regular on the show, well then I couldn't be happier.
-Dan's back. We can tell he's been having a rough time because he hasn't shaved and his shirt's untucked. For some reason he's back reminiscing and with whitey and he blames all the mistakes he's made in his life on a high school basketball game.
-Jaime has a wi-fi enabled phone, as if I couldn't hate this kid anymore
-Dan starts to act like he's going blow his own head off, but then tries to force whitey to do it. They hug it out
-This scene features Kate Voegele's Inside Out.
-Crap, Millie is staying tree hill. This means more Mouth. I am not happy
-Dan tries to see his new grandchild because 'she's the only one in this world that doesn't know what I've done.' He then spikes her into the cement and runs off. I may have made that last part up. He really quotes Where the Wild Things Are and apologizes for being a bastard.
-Ahh saddling her daughter with her maiden name Sawyer, Peyton reveals that the kid's middle name is Brooke. Sawyer Brooke Scott. Poor Kid
-Ahh Victoria tries to have a mom moment and tells Brooke to go to LA and tell Julian she loves him. This of course makes up for years of neglect and forcing her daughter out of her own company.
-I have to be honest I'm a little dissapointed. So far the episode has just been about tieing up loose ends and making everybody love eachother. Its almost as if the show runners weren't confident they were getting renewed.
-Ahh we have all the characters trading sentences for the closing montage. I really hope they show Nathan trying to play with NBA players. They sort of do, with him being introduced as a starter
-Hey did you know that "Sometimes happiness comes from friends and family, and the quiet nobility of leading a good life," the more you know
-Does nobody on this show shave?
-If this was a movie you'd kiss me right now
No if this was movie I'd say I love you then I'd Kiss you
I Love you

Voiceover: Believe that dreams come true every day. Because they do

I may start crying

-That is one ugly baby Peyton and Lucas have

Anyway actually kind of a dissapointing finale, I chalk it up to the fact that they weren't sure the show was getting renewed, but the fact that the coma didn't last through the entire episode is unacceptable. Still I'll be back next year, and really how couldn I not with this plot description (via CW press release):

In season seven of ONE TREE HILL our beloved characters learn the struggle to live an exceptional life doesn’t end once you’ve achieved your dreams. Whether they found true love, answered a call to greatness, or sought redemption for sins of the past, nothing that’s come before compares to the challenges our characters now face to keep their dreams alive, their friendships intact and their lives full in the place they call home

Gotta love it (really this show has been on six seasons???)

Rating ouf ten: 9

Doomsday

There's a Blockbuster a block away from my apartment and about once a month they do a four for $20 DVD sale. I am unable to pass this up even though the inevitable time crunch happens and I have stacks of unwatched DVD's sitting around (a good portion of which are some random titles that I picked up to fill up my four). This is one step in a continual effort to get through the monstrosity.

Doomsday combines two genres (post-apocalyptic thriller and man on a mission) that I have an soft spot for. As a result I'm probably predisposed to give it more of a pass than I would, say, a Romantic Comedy or something starring Adam Sandler. Bias aside, its a solid B-Movie (and I mean that in the best sense of the word) that in general delivers what it sets out to do.

The film begins with the aptly named Reaper Virus ripping its way through Scotland. Of course there is no cure so in a drastic measure the government of Great Britain walls of the Scottish border, mines the oceans, and institutes a no fly zone so no one can get in or out, leaving everyone in Scotland to die. However just before all this happens we see a little girl get flown on the last helicopter out of dodge, and then a smash cut to thirty years in the future. It turns out the rest of Britain hasn't been doing so well in the intervening years and is near the breaking point (note to self between this film, Children of Men, and V for Vendetta, I think settling in England may not be the best choice to settle in for the long term). The government has just found out that the reaper virus has reappeared in London, and unless a cure can be found in the next two days they intend flood the infected area to get rid of all traces of the disease. The potential for a cure lies in Scotland where the government has discovered traces of life and, but they need to send a team in to find it. The person chosen to lead said team? Why of course its the little girl from the beginning for the film now embodied in her ass-kicking goodness by an eye patch sporting Rhona Mitra.

And we're off. The team sets out to find the mysterious Doctor Kane (the scientist who was working on the cure when Scotland was walled off) and note that not only are there signs of life but the survivors have separated into two distinct tribes. One, in the cities, is populated by heavily tattooed, mad-max esque, feather haired wild men who have the tendency to eat whoever invades their sanctum. Really its like the crowd from a mid-eighties Flock of Seagulls concert that has been jacked up on crystal meth.

The other tribe, led by the enigmatic Kane, is based out of a castle in the country and have completely modeled themselves on the middle ages (right down to writing on parchment and saying 'thou' all the time). They even have public executions.

This me to a digression. If I've learned anything from movies it's that once society collapses the survivors will break into groups similar to the two above. Therefore assuming that I survive the Apocalypse (which given my raw animal strength, reptilian cunning, and rapier wit is a given) the question becomes which group would I join? The hedonists definitely seem like a lot more fun and not as hung up on things like laws and good behavior. Plus I think I could rock a Mohawk and face tattoos like nobody's business. On the downside I'm not sure I could completely get on board with random acts of cannibalism, and all the chains I'd have to wear around would probably chafe.

The medievalists on the other hand have the advantage of stability, and probably a better health plan (in that I would probably live longer), but given my staggering intellect I would probably be seen as a threat and either be consigned to a kitchen, exiled, or stoned. But on the plus side I would get to wear armor, swing cleavers, and generally act like a character from the castlevania video game.

So the final verdict? Its a tough call, I would probably be able to have a better chance imposing my will on the thunderdome, but live longer with King Arthur. Still the Apocalypse has happened so how long do I really want to live anyway? Mohawk and body ink here I come.

Oh yeah, the film. The rest of the plot is fairly straightforward, and predictable, but so what. I don't watch these films for the intricate plotting. The film delivers several well choreographed action sequences, and one of the more entertaining car chases this side of Blues Brothers. Also while it generally plays everything straight, there are some nice humorous touches (ie. the gift shop sign still being up at the castle) sprinkled throughout that show that the film's makers aren't taking themselves too seriously. Mitra does a nice job playing an Eastwood-esque loner who is badder than anyone else, and her number two is played by the main character from Primary Colors (Adrian Lester) who I'm always happy to see getting work. Basically if you're looking for a high-end B-Movie, with plenty of gore and action you could do worse than this.

Next Day Air

A film starring Turk from Scrubs (Donald Faison) and Avon from The Wire (Wood Harris) as a pot-head deliveryman and incompetent criminal respectively? Yes I think that's something I might be interested in. Particularly since one of my rules in life is that anytime someone from a a show headlined by the guy who directed Garden State with the guy who played Ford Prefect in the Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy (Mos Def) I have to watch. Anyway onto the film. The story revolves around four groups:

1) Leo (Faison) a pot-head deliveryman for the titular Next Day Air, who lives with his mom (also his boss) and pretty much exists to get his next joint. In his haze he accidentally delivers a package to the wrong apartment, one that is occupied by:
2) Guch (Harris) and his two buddies, who are the very embodiment of small time criminals. They're just off a botched bank robbery (they only got out with the security tapes) and once they see the package contains 10 keys of cocaine they see it as a way to become big time drug dealers. Unfortunately the package was meant for:
3) A Puerto Rican couple down the hall who aren't exactly happy that it didn't arrive. In particular they're worried about the person who sent them the cocaine,
4) A mexican drug boss who previously killed his contact in philadelphia and likes to walk around with the Miami Slicked back hair and soul patch. He is also shown cutting out somebody's tongue in a flashback.

All of the parties spend at least part of the film chasing or trying to sell the cocaine with really limited success. They all have incredibly inflated senses of self worth, when in reality they're all pretty marginal (at best) at what they do. It's this false bravado that drives enjoyment of the film as I always like laughing at blowhards. For the majority of its running time the film maintains a loose and relaxed vibe that reminded me a bit of Out Of Sight. It loses steam during the inevitable climatic shootout as it tries to play everything straight and even has one of the characters learn a life lesson (always a mistake, particularly in a comedy), but up to that point it has an amiable charm that makes it 84 minutes go by smoothly. It's not the most profound piece of cinema ever, but its not boring and manages to keep a consistent tone throughout which is more than be said for a lot of other stuff out there (Wolverine I'm looking at you).

Star Trek

I had a whole post worked out about how Star Trek was a difficult film to make given the success of other recent films, like Dark Knight and Iron Man, based on existing franchises, but I gave in to my inherent laziness and decided not to (not to mention I started the previous review in almost the same manner and don't want to be called hackneyed and or cliched - shut up). This is a huge film, you know what its about, and if you don't there are a hundred better written reviews you can peruse. I will say that the film successfully revitalizes what had become an exceedingly stale franchise, and is fairly entertaining to boot. The plot is a little clunky (but I'll forgive it since it sets up the series to go in a new direction), but the film nails the characters and vibe of the original Star Trek that its fans grew up loving. Had they messed that up no amount of slick effects or elaborate plotting could have caused me to really care where the franchise is going. The casting is spot on (with the exception of Winona Ryder as spock's mother which was just disconcerting) and the writing captures the original characters' tone and appeal without coming off as a pale imitation. Provided future installments can maintain this film's tone I look forward to future installments. Almost as much as I'm looking forward to Night at The Museum 2.

The Merry Gentleman

This is a deceptively simple film where one of the main characters is a hit man, and even though that fact matters for the plot, its really not that important. When was the last time you could say that about a film featuring a contract killer? The story revolves around a young woman, played by Kelly McDonald, who recently moved away from an abusive relationship. One night she sees the aforementioned hitman (played my Michael Keaton also directing) on a ledge of a building (this is right after he's killed someone) apparently ready to jump. She screams and he falls back on the roof. He later seeks her out (she of course having no idea he is the same man she saw earlier) and they begin the kind of relationship that results when you have two lonely people trying to make a connection. There is some action surrounding the police pursuit of the killer, but really the film is first and foremost about their relationship, and to be honest that's all I needed.

The film plays everything low key and real, and does a nice job capturing how people actually talk and interact (discomfort, awkwardness, etc.) It also doesn't feel the need to explain everyone's motivations and thoughts, instead letting the audience just experience the character interactions and draw their own conclusions. I particularly enjoyed that the film didn't feel it necessary to provide an explanation for Keaton's character was a hitman, or who he was killing and why. That's just who he was and we should accept it.

The film that I was actually most reminded by of this was Once. Not because the female leads in both of them had great accents, but rather because they're both little understated movies that took genres that 90% of the time end of feeling flashy and artificial (the musical for Once, hitman film for this one) and made them feel natural and completely organic. I'm not saying that The Merry Gentleman is the greatest thing of all time (that would of course be Crank 2), and I do have some minor quibbles but for once I'm going to abstain from listing them (I must be getting soft). I'll just say that I really enjoyed seeing something that exhibited a fair bit of intelligence in its execution and nice feel for how people interact in real life (or so I've heard since I never leave me apartment I wouldn't actually know).

One Tree Hill

I'll be honest there's been two episodes that I haven't blogged and while they've been amazing (Peyton gets in a horrible car accident but shows no sign of it right after, Skills hits on Jaime's teacher, Nathan turns down a contract to play in europe) I don't think you'll be to confused by the plot discussion here if I don't do an extensive recap.

-Anyway this weeks episode begins with Peyton recording a video for her kid to watch, you know since she might die in childbirth, and tells the kid about a playlist she prepared that her spawn should listen too whenever they get down (playlist called 100 songs to save your life - seriously, what do you want to bet it features the Fray). Well not only does the list feature the typical boring hipster nonsense (Audioslave, the cure) but also the music of two characters on the show who also have happen to have alblums they're currently promoting in real life, and the show immediately cuts to one of the characters pllaying a song off of the real alblum that they just released. This is a whole new level of product placement that I can't help but stand up and salute.
-Peyton ends the video by begging the kid to take care of Lucas. I'm sure a newborn is going to be the one to keep him off the edge. 'Hey Dad why don't you put the bottle of Jack down and change my diaper'
-Lucas freaks out at Peyton making a death video and refuses to marry her now because they're not just doing something 'just in case.' The logic being of course that if they get married she'll die. Man if you don't want to get married just say so.
-Lucas is sporting a particularly impressive faux-hawk in this episode
-In the first realistic sports touch in the show's history they have Nathan's NBDL game being scouted by the Clippers. I would have expected them to have him go right to the lakers. There's no way he ends up there of course, the show's not moving to LA, but still I appreciate the effort.
-This moment of realism is destroyed by the fact that they make the game well attended and covered by a television crew.
-Peyton has a baby shower. I really don't want to talk about it
-Skills has to take a 4th grader with a ventriloquist dummy on his date with Jaime's hot teacher. Does he get blocked by the kid constantly while pursuing his romatic conquest? He Does. Does the meal end with the kid saying "Mom Says I shouldn't eat Dairy" of course
-Hey I can watch the confessional of a fictional character from the 90210 reboot online. I guess we know my plans for the weekend!
-I haven't even mentioned that Brooke's psuedo adopted 17 year old decides to leave to live with her birth mother. Got a little dusty here if you know what I mean (really my apartment is a mess)
-Aaah, Lucas relents and decides to make an honest woman out of Peyton. I guess we know what the season finale is going to revolve around. I'm guessing a hurrican will hit.

Rating out of 10: a solid 13

American Gangster

There's a Blockbuster a block away from my apartment and about once a month they do a four for $20 DVD sale. I am unable to pass this up even though the inevitable time crunch happens and I have stacks of unwatched DVD's sitting around (a good portion of which are some random titles that I picked up to fill up my four). This is one step in a continual effort to get through the monstrosity.

There is a fundamental flaw with this film, but I'm not even sure you can blame the film for it. Before getting into that I want to waste five hundred words talking about other stuff. This story about the rise and fall of drug kingpin Frank Lucas in 1970's New York is an interesting one, and generally makes for a watchable film. However given the talent involved it would have been shocking if the film hadn't been at least marginally entertaining (Russel Crowe, Denzel Washington, Ridley Scott, that chick who plays the hard edged doctor from Private Practice - and don't start with me I know its a horrible show but they shoot it rightwhere I used to live in Santa Monica so I occasionally like to watch ten or fifteen minutes to see my old hood. Don't judge me). However the film is kind of schizophrenic trying to all at once be a traditional police procedural, an in depth character study of two' singularly driven' men, a glitzy goodfellas-esque look at gangster life, and, for the last twenty minutes in particular, a clumsy attempt to make a statement about race. The film never really settles on a consistent tone and as a result left me feeling disjointed, and a little unsure of the ultimate point.

None of this is really the major drawback though, that can be summed up in two words - The Wire. After having seen police work and the drug war dealt with in the most detailed and powerful level imaginable over the course of that show's five seasons, its impossible to watch a film dealing with similiar themes, but in a more superficial manner, without realizing what's lacking (it doesn't help that one of the first scenes of American Gangster features one of the key actors from The Wire which immediately got me making comparisons). I think American Gangster is the first film I'd watched since I finished my Wire binge last summer that tried to 'seriously' deal with the drug trade, and I wonder if the show will have ruined any other films of this genre for me as well. If anything I think that these types of films would be better off not focusing on the trade, or its effects on people, because there's no way they can ever approach the depths or pathos of the show. Rather, like the aforementioned Goodfellas, they need to find something else for me to grab onto (chracters, plot, explosions, power ballads) so I don't spend the whole time comparing it to arguable the most important show in television history (On the road with Huel Howser being excepted of course).

Anyway I didn't mean to turn this post into another slobberfest for The Wire (yes I did, go rent it already if you haven't seen it), American Gangster isn't a bad film, its watchable, but it definitely isn't a great one and I'm not sure you need to go out of your way to burn the two and a half plus hours necessary to watch it.

X-Men Orgins: Wolverine

The two thoughts that immediately filled my head after leaving the theater were 'serviceable' and 'forgettable.' The film's not horrible, its not good, its just what it is, and what it is is a fairly inoffensive not very memorable action film. There's nothing really original plot wise, and the story does nothing new with the character that we haven't seen in the previous films, plus the action scenes were fairly pedestrian, so I really just didn't see the point of the whole enterprise. The effects weren't even that impressive so there isn't really even a visual flair to recommend it. The film does occasionally have a nice sense of humor (particularly the 10 minutes Ryan Reynolds is on the screen), and I like carnage as much as the next guy but there was really nothing here to distinguish it from a hundred other generic action films. I won't even bother with a plot description, if you've seen the trailer or any of the prior films you already know what happens. If you do end up seeing it you won't hate it, you just won't remember much of it after you get out. Go see Crank 2 instead.

Crank 2: High Voltage

Is this film incredibly immature? Undoubtedly. Is it over the top? You could say that. Does it have narrative consistency? Come on. Is it a borderline surrealist masterpiece? Quite possibly. Did I enjoy myself immensely? Yes, yes I did.

Having never seen the original Crank I can't say how the two stack up and maybe I missed a lot of character background, but I doubt it. The film begins with our hero Chev Chelios falling out a helicopter and being immediately thrown into a van by chinese mobsters. They immediately start harvesting his organs to implant in a dying triad boss. Chev just rolls his eyes and groans when they take his heart and stick in a replacement, but when it turns out they're going to cut off little chev, well that's just too much. He breaks out of the hospital and tries to run his heart down. It turns out that his replacement heart can only stay powered so long, so chev then spends the rest of the film shocking his heart back into beating. That's it, and really its glorious.
Rememder when I said that Speed Racer was a live action cartoon? Crank 2 is a live action video game. Chev runs around, fights, kills, shocks himself back into shape, all the while all the films elements are turned up to eleven. I don't to give too much away but tell me you wouldn't enjoy a film with all this:

-Chev repeatedly sticking himself with a taser
-A fight scene where the characters switch into an old school Godzilla, Man-In-Suit style, fight scene complete with stop motion photography
-The climatic fight scene is eventually framed as an eighties music video complete with an REO Speedwagon power ballad

Look this will never be mistaken for a great film, but its so over the top and aware of its ridiculousness that you can't help but enjoy it. Really the closest thing I can compare this too, favorably, is Shoot 'Em Up, another film that goes so gloriously over the top that you can't help but go along for the ride.

Plus there's something to be said for a film completely doing what it sets out to do. Maybe its not shooting for narrative greatness, but it knows exactly what it is and sets out to revel in its excess. Give me that over The Reader any day.

Post Script: I've heard some criticism that the film hates women, I wouldn't necessarily agree. It hates everybody. No group is potrayed in a positive light here. The stereotypes are broad, everybody is portrayed as being an ultra violent sociopath, and if it didn't take itself so lightly I would probably find it all incredibly offensive. But I don't.